Rule 1: I will always love God more than anyone else.
Rule 2: Spoilers.
Rule 3: You may never see all my layers. Get used to it.
Rule 4: I'm an introvert. I shrink from too much social interaction.
Rule 5: I don't steal.
Rule 6: I don't share.
Rule 7: I love my family, flaws and all. Get over it and love them too.
Rule 8: Be honest with me.
Rule 9: I can't read between the lines if it pertains to me.
Rule 10: I can read between the lines when it pertains to anyone else though.
Rule 11: I see a lot more than I talk about.
Rule 12: If you get me to talk to you for more than 15 minutes, you must be pretty special.
Rule 13: I'm a nerd. I love nerdy things.
Rule 14: Never get me truly angry. You don't want to see that.
Rule 15: I'm going to surprise you.
Rule 16: I will always have books on my shelf that I haven't read yet.
Rule 17: I will always have lots of books.
Rule 18: I really like Doctor Who. A lot. It's hilarious.
Rule 19: I really, really like Narnia. If it was real, I'd go there and never come back.
Rule 20: I write in a journal. No, I won't let you read it.
Rule 21: I write poetry and songs. No, I probably won't share those either.
Rule 22: I am sarcastic. Probably too much. I'm sorry if I ever say something that hurts you.
Rule 23: I can be dumb sometimes. Please tell me if I hurt you. Otherwise, I won't have a clue.
Rule 24: If I friend-zone you, it's probably forever. Sorry. Well, not sorry.
Rule 25: If I don't immediately ice you, you have at least half a chance.
Rule 26: If you do something inherently stupid, like hurt my friends, I will ice you. See Rule 24.
Rule 27: You don't have to give me gifts to impress me. But I still like them occasionally.
Rule 28: If you can challenge me and make me think differently, I will think you are amazing.
Rule 29: If you scramble my brain, I'm not responsible for remembering anything you said after that.
Rule 30: Just ask.
Rule 31: I like traveling. But I also need a home base to come back to.
Rule 32: If you hurt my family/close friends/co-workers, I will bill your next-of-kin for my bail money. Fair warning.
Rule 33: If you look in my purse at any given time, you will see at least 1 book.
Rule 34: If I show you any of my writing that hasn't been previously published, know that I just gave you a loaded gun and asked you not to shoot me.
Rule 35: If you shoot me with the loaded gun from Rule 34, there can only be two results. They are not necessarily mutually exclusive. A) I will turtle, and ice you for eternity. B) I will bill your next of kin for emotional trauma and bail money.
I think that's all for today....
The Doctor's Rules... in no particular order...
Rule 408: Time is not the boss of you.
Rule 27: Never knowingly be serious.
Rule 1: The Doctor lies.
Rule 7: Never run when you are scared.
Rule 8: Never ignore a coincidence. Unless you're busy, then always ignore a coincidence.
Rule 10: Don't wander off.
Rule #: You never want to listen to reason.
Rule #: Everyone is important.
Rule #: Never put the Doctor in a trap.
Rule #: Don't diss the sonic.
Rule #: Run.
Rule #: Six words can bring down a government.
Rule #: Always take a banana to a party. Bananas are good.
Rule #: Don't drink the water.
Rule #: Count the shadows.
Rule #: Don't blink.
Rule #: Never shoot the Tardis.
Rule #: Keep out signs are merely suggestions.
Rule 179: Anyone remotely interesting is mad in some way or another.
Rule 169: Books are the best weapons in the world.
Rule 166: If you’re going to die, you might as well die in style.
Rule 137: There’s always something worth living for.
Rule 377: Everybody knows that everybody dies, but not everyday.
Rule 410: Never trust a diet pill.
Rule 402: Crossing into established events is strictly forbidden…except for cheap tricks…
Rule 308: “Life is short. And you are hot,” may - or may not - be a successful pick-up line.
Rule 392: Always wear shoes you can run in… just in case.
Rule 307: It’s not breaking and entering; it’s sonicing and entering.
Rule 275: The definition of genocide is “over my dead body”.
Rule 268: One must never interfere in the affairs of people and planets, unless there’s a child crying.
Rule 266: If you disagree with a manual, throw it in a supernova.
Rule 256: You can’t fool a genius with psychic paper (especially if that genius is Shakespeare).
Rule 234: The little shop is always right next to the exit.
Rule 232: Never try to get to the Doctor through the people he loves.
Rule 226: “I will push you into the event horizon of a collapsing galaxy” is a perfectly good threat for any occasion.
Rule 223: Ten is the kind of man who doesn’t give second chances.
Rule 220: No one is meant to absorb the time vortex.
Rule 221: Never underestimate the power of a good, strong cup of tea.
Rule 443: The Doctor never follows a plan.
Rule 213: Anyone with a fob watch has the potential to be a Time Lord. Plan accordingly.
Rule 189: Museums are how he keeps score.
Rule 398: If you travel to the past, don’t touch your younger self.
Rule 397: If it’s time to go, remember what you’re leaving; remember the best.
Rule #: Remember that River lies too. All the time. She has to. Spoilers.
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